Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 30, 2009

A late night and caffeine

I occasionally struggle getting to sleep and the other night was an example of this I fell asleep around 3:00am or 3:30am. All together I slept about two hours that night. I had a meeting that morning at 7:30am. I also gave up caffeine three weeks prior, I did give in and decide to have some caffeinated coffee but before the coffee could kick in I was already driving to my life coaching appointment. I was merging onto on freeway to another and my blinker stayed on I attempted several times to turn off the blinker only managing to turn on and off the windshield wipers multiply times. I stared at the wipers dumbfounded “how could this be happening I am trying to turn off the blinker”, I said to myself. I took a deep breath and thought if the control is not on the right of my steering wheel where could it be and inspiration hit “ahha, on the left” and magically I could turn the blinker was off. I felt so silly all I could do was laugh. In case you were wondering the coffee did kick in eventually but by then I was already at the meeting with all my neurons firing. It is possible at times like this to choose to judge our selves harshly and I am suggesting strongly don’t. Allow your self a good laugh at your own expense and chalk it up to just one of those moments. If you only get one thing from reading this blog learn to take your self lightly. A guide to follow is one learn not to be easily offended, two learn to laugh and enjoy yourself when your silly don’t consider it a character flaw. You will have a much more relaxed life when you practice these ideas.

Thecoaching group (conference call) for women in their mid life crisis starts the week of November 16th. I am starting the group in November because the holidays have begun and this can be a stressful time for women. I only have eight spots left. If you are interested call me right away so I can hold your spot. Please keep in mind when you call I will do a brief interview to see if you are a good fit for the group. You get two individual sessions and eight weeks of groups sessions at an incredible discount call now and reserve your spot.

Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.

Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLC
(404) 259-1335
http://www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.YouCanHaveItAll.wordpress.com

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 27, 2009

This is just for fun

I like to jump on youtube occasionally to get a quick laugh.

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 27, 2009

Controling Your Mind Part III (Visualizing)

Yesterday looking to be inspired I walked by the pond near my house and the fall colors are just touching the trees it is beautiful. I live in the south so unlike my home town of Napa California we actually have seasons. I was thinking as a walked past the park what could I write about next in my blog there are so many exciting topic I was having trouble deciding. I could write another blog about taking care of yourself or maybe something new. As I looked around at the beautiful day I decided that talking about how to use visualization to attain the goals you set for yourself.
Visualizing can help us accelerate our re-framing practice from my early blog in controlling you mind part I, it can help you have a better attitude about your co workers and the list can go on and on. This particular skill is seriously under used. I will give you an example of how visualizing can help. I gave a couple a visualizing homework assignment, they were to visualize the marriage they wanted with each and have strong happy emotions when they were visualizing. Until this point they were struggling with communicating and the husband was having trouble expressing his feelings. After only four days of practice we had another session. They told me we don’t know what’s changed but things have been a lot better and the husband was sharing emotions. I will tell you what has changed their focus they are in the middle of re-training their brains to have a good relationship with each other and brain is more than happy to help.

When we use visualizing it is best to become completely involved in what your are imagining down to small details what are the smells that go along with the goal, what are the emotions, what does it look like, are their other people involved and make the emotions as strong and positive as you can. Being very clear with your visualizing literally builds new neuropaths. Your brain does not know the difference between real life and the imagination as far as your brain is concerned you accomplished your goal and it makes success pathways in your brain and with repetition these become natural more natural than the pathways that recently told you that you couldn’t do it. Are you beginning to see how this can benefit you in re-training your brain. I am going to tell you a SECRET now so write this down the stronger the positive feelings you have while visualizing the quicker you will develop new neuropaths ways in the brain and this will help you achieve your goals faster. Please remember practice, I would suggest at least two to three times a day.

I am going to start a coaching group (conference call) for women in their mid life crisis in two weeks if you are interested give me a call. I am starting the group in November because the holidays have begun and this can be a stressful time for women. I am sending this to my list and space is limited I will only allow 15 women in the group. If you are interested call me right away so I can hold your spot. Please keep in mind when you call I will do a brief interview to see if you are a good fit for the group.

Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.

Greta Jaeger, PLC, LPC
404-259-1335
http://www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.YouCanHaveItAll.com

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 25, 2009

Taking Care of YOURSELF

I decided to get up this beautiful morning and begin writing my next book. The sun is shining and I am listening to Nora Jones. I am writing about all the tips I know and have been taught to help get anyone who is stressed about the recession back on track. In these times it is important to stay focused and inspired. It is good to remember that books, music and inspirational people can all help us stay psychologically healthy in hard times. Women are so sensitive to the ebb and flow of our, families, cities and cultures; that we become stressed and overwhelmed at our inability to help, we lose focus on what we need to do.

Keep it simple, we can’t solve everything for everybody. We can listen and support and love but often these are the only gifts we can afford to give or are able to give. We must stay healthy and grounded to help the other people in our lives. We can’t do this if we take on every pain and frustration and make it our own. When you feel yourself getting really caught up in your family or friends pain take a deep breath in and when you blow the breath out imagine letting go of all the pain and frustration that is building in you, so you can just listen.

Remind yourself that if you can help you will. Often you will find your friends only need you to listen. Do the little things you do for yourself in the good times so you feel good. If you love to get your nails done but having been putting it off go get them done. Taking care of yourself will help you have the strength and ability to help the other people in your life. Make sure you have friends you can talk with as well about any challenges that you are facing, and I encourage you to have friends that are good listeners and positive about life. We are a community just keeping a positive attitude can help those around us and our selves.

I am going to start a coaching group (conference call) for women in their mid life crisis in two weeks if you are interested give me a call. I am starting the group in November because the holidays have begun and this can be a stressful time for women. I am sending this to my list and space is limited I will only allow 15 women in the group. If you are interested call me right away so I can hold your spot. Please keep in mind when you call I will do a brief interview to see if you are a good fit for the group.

Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.

Greta Jaeger, PLC, LPC
404-259-1335
http://www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.YouCanHaveItAll.wordpress.com

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 23, 2009

Inspirational video

I couldn’t resist the title I recently gave up caffeinated coffee.

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 21, 2009

Controling Your Mind Part II

Controlling Your Mind Part II:

There are several books presently sitting on my old mahogany lawyer’s desk, many of which are about speaking, life coaching and inspiring others. There is one, in particular, though, that I’d like to mention, titled “Peace, which is full of quotes by Mahatma Ghandi. Now, if there was ever a man that had the ability to control his mind, it was Ghandi. In the name of “Peace”, he could go for long periods of time without eating and live. In fact, he inspired an entire peace movement against a violent government, based on “love”, instead of anger, and won. If there ever was an accidental politician, it was him.

What did Ghandi have that we don’t have… or don’t have yet? What motivation did he have? How was he able to face insurmountable odds so fearlessly and lovingly? Perhaps it was a combination of a few of his character traits, such as his discipline, persistence, compassion, love, faith, drive, focus, along with his inspiring ways. Today, though, I’d like to turn your attention to discipline.

Unfortunately, discipline is not easily found in the American culture. The most obvious places to look are in the areas of sports and business. If we consider sports celebrities for a moment, though, they may excel at their sport, but many often get caught up in drugs, alcohol, and abusive or bad marriages. They may be successful in their careers, but they lack that same success and discipline in their personal lives. I believe this may be a result of our cultural belief that if you are disciplined, then you can’t possibly have any fun, and perhaps you’ll even tend to be a bit militaristic.

Wall Street is another place where there has been no discipline. If the people running these companies had controlled their greed, they would still be making money. Perhaps they wouldn’t make it as quickly or make as much, but it would not have disappeared instantly as it did at the beginning of our current recession.

If we want to successfully throw off our negative thinking, then we have to learn and choose some skills that will help us in this process. We then need to use discipline when practicing them. If you read my last blog, I informed you of two skills that will significantly reduce your negative thinking. If you are disciplined in your approach and incorporate these techniques into your daily life, you’re certain to find success. Remember… practice, practice, practice and more practice makes permanent.

Here is a suggestion that can help you make discipline a habit in your life:

First – Pick a skill you want to learn. In this example, we will use catching your negative thoughts and reframing them.
Second – Write down any negative thoughts that you know you have consistently, and then write a positive reframe.
Third – Three times a day, practice a positive reframe with all of the negative thoughts you wrote down.
Fourth – During your day, if and when you catch a negative thought or story playing in your mind, take a deep breath and positively reframe it, and/or think about how you can create an action around that negative thought.

If you are diligent and perform this process for the next thirty days, it will start to become a habit. If you are disciplined and continue on for another month or two, it will become very natural for you to reframe your negative thoughts.

If you are tired of living with your negative thoughts and struggling to get out of the rut you are in email or call Greta Jaeger she is a master at reframing and she will accelerate your learning process. You will move from stuck to pursue your dreams call or email now.

Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLC
404-259-1335
http://www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.YouCanHaveItAll.Wordpress.com

Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 12, 2009

Control Your MIND Part 1

Controling Your MIND
Part 1:

Recently, I received a comment on my blog suggesting that I go into more detail the next time I write about the topic of controlling one’s mind.  By the way, I appreciate the feedback it was motivation.  When I write, I do often tend to remain brief.  However, that is not always best or beneficial, as in this case.  So, in this post, we’ll discuss this topic further.

Learning to control my mind has been a life long struggle for me. I began the process while in college at U.C. Davis.  During this time, I realized I was depressed and had been at least mildly depressed for many years.  While graduating with my Bachelors in Psychology, however, I went to a fabulous therapist. We only had a total of four inspirational sessions together, but they were four sessions that would prove invaluable in my quest for growth.

During the first session, she let me know right off the bat that we didn’t have much time.   “Let’s get to work,” she spoke, “and you need to know right now that you will have to work hard.”  I remember her words and how willing I was to do precisely as she had asked.  The tasks given me were simple, but during that period, they changed my life.  Now, I’m going to share what I learned with you.

Plainly put, here are the initials steps I needed to take.

First – I began journaling daily.  I simply scribbled down whatever came to me in the moment.
Second – I had to learn how to say “no” to my parents to begin establishing my necessary separation from them.
Third – I had to not only start, but also consistently practice, reframing my negative thoughts.

Although I had a good idea, at this point, what “reframing” was all about, I was by no means an expert.  In fact, it took a great deal of time and application before I finally began to master these concepts.  Now, I can share my expertise with you, helping you achieve in a matter of months… or even weeks… what took me years to learn.  I’m here to tell you that, by following some simple steps, you truly can and will become the MASTER of your OWN MIND.

There are two vital things I want you to keep in mind right now – the importance of breath and the art of reframing negative thoughts.  The foundation breath and the ability to reframe our thoughts are two things that help our minds become open to new ideas and new ways of being in the world.  When we stay in a negative state of mind, we stay in a state in which we tend to focus on and seek out negativity within ourselves as well as our environments. We become inept at finding the good side of something even when the positive aspects are obvious. For example, it’s a bright, sunny beautiful day, but instead of enjoying the weather, we only notice the heat and humidity and feel compelled to complain about it.

It becomes a habit to see the negative.  In fact, as humans, our survival instincts are geared this way, to some degree.  The “fight or flight” instinct is one of those innate parts of our make-up that aids us in recognizing danger.  The problem, however, is this.  We’re no longer running from tigers and bears, yet we’re still living life as if we were in survival mode.  People have evolved since the age of hunters and gatherers and our mind has the capacity to control its’ thoughts and reactions.  Learning to reframe your thoughts can help significantly in changing some of these negative thought processes, habits, and behaviors.

Humans have an average of 5,000 to 6,000 thoughts a day.  Most of these are negative or neutral.  The majority of us, through our conditioning, have unconsciously made negativity a habit.  There is good news, though!  If we can become a master at negative thinking, this means that we can also become masters at POSITIVE thinking.  All it takes is practice.

First, we have to learn how to take notice of our thoughts.  Right after you catch a negative thought, practice taking in a nice long deep breath. The next step is one that takes a lot of practice and creativity.  This is the point in which we reframe the negative thought we just caught and turn it into a positive statement.

Here are some examples:

Negative – “I can’t do it.”

Positive – “I can do it.”  Alternatively, you could say, “I can do it. I just haven’t learned how yet.”

Negative – “This sucks, another traffic jam!”

Positive – “Traffic is slow again today.”  Alternatively, “Traffic is slow, giving me a few minutes to practice some deep breathing.”

Negative – “My job sucks.”

Positive – “I’m not enjoying my job right now.”  Alternatively, “I love this part of my job (insert info),” or “I enjoy parts of my job (list them), and some, I don’t.  Can I do anything about the parts I don’t like?”

Sometimes, you’ll notice the reframe still sounds a little negative.  You may have also noticed that the reframe consists of an action statement, the purpose being to drive you towards making a change. In the end, moving forward (doing something) is more positive than sitting in your yucky, sucky, negativity.  Believe it or not, even when we make what appears to be the wrong choice, it is often better than making no choice at all.  If we’re moving, it will shake things up.  I am not advocating that you make bad or unwise choices.  I am simply challenging you, trying to help you understand that until you do make a choice, you will remain stuck.  The easiest choice is to change our thinking, making it either action- oriented and positive or just positive.

When we practice reframing, we must remember that we are not our thoughts and our thoughts do not control us.  We control our thoughts or we choose not to control them.  Do not expect that you will gain instant gratification using these methods.  It takes practice and practice makes permanent, not perfect. Please also remember that if you have been diagnosed with depression or anxiety, this is not a replacement for any treatment your doctor is presently administering.  These are supplemental techniques that you can use daily to improve your life.

Please send any questions to:

greta@CoachingYourDreams.com

Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.

Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLC
http://www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
404-259-1335

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 1, 2009

Pursueing your dreams

Check out this youtube.com video if you haven’t already seen the Last Lecture. Go to youtube.com and type in Last lecture it will come up Dr. Pausch.

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | October 1, 2009

Control your mind

So… your scared, confused and you feel like you are the only one, the only one that thinks and feels the way you do! The challenges we face in life often look like this, this self doubt and low self esteem. Anytime we face new experiences or old fears doubt and confuse roll in and often take over our everyday thinking. Sometimes all we have to experience is someone being irritated with us to fall into a black pit of negative thinking. The problem is every time we look outside of ourselves for confirmation that we are ok we get mixed signals sometime people are supportive other time they are not and we are much more likely to believe those that are not supportive even though we pretend not to care.
First we have to be careful who we listen to and who we hang out with since positive energy is catching you want to focus on having positive people around you and in your life. Next you must learn to control your mind I am sure you are recognizing a reoccurring theme in my writing. The brain produces the negative thoughts the mind responds either by expanding or contracting based on whether or not you are having positive thoughts or negative thoughts. When the mind is expanding because of our positive thinking we are using the law of attraction and it is working for us. When the mind is contracting because of negative thinking the law of attraction is still working for us only now it is pulling negative things into our lives instead of positive.
In case this sounds a little strange think about when you are scared if you concentrate on thinking about your fear you become more fearful. If you take a deep breath or two and concentrate on something positive and enjoyable the fear recedes. When the fear recedes you are in control of your thoughts and your mind is expanding (more on the mind later).
Practice:
Think about a stressful event or decision you have made in the past and check in with how you feel is your chest tight, your breath shallow or harsh, or your pulse rate increased? What are you feeling?
Next take a couple of deep breathes think of a fun or happy event in the past and check in with how you feel is your chest tight, your breath shallow or harsh, or your pulse rate increased? What are you feeling?

Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLC
http://www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
YouCanHaveItAll.WordPress.com
(404) 259-1335

Posted by: Greta Jaeger | September 26, 2009

Check out this youtube video

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